Once upon a time, it was assumed that if you were smart and willing to work hard, you would be successful; everything would fall into place. Intelligence and book-smarts were acknowledged, honored, and nurtured, but people began to realize there’s more to it than just being the brightest person in the room.
Most of us know someone incredibly clever who just can’t get ahead. What could be missing?
It’s possible that that individual has a low EQ or Emotional Quotient. Not everyone can manage their emotions, to be empathetic, and manage conflict, yet all those things are necessary for success. Without the tools to build relationships with people, your ability to succeed will always be hindered.
Building relationships with others actually starts with self-awareness. Here are three ways to become more aware of what makes you tick.
- Take some time to journal. Write out your goals, plans and priorities. Who are you really? Is your life reflective of your own values?
- Know your triggers. What are the situations that compromise your ability to cope? Maybe it’s a noisy room. Maybe it’s a certain person who knows exactly how to push your buttons. When you know what sets you off, you can make a plan to handle it.
- Learn to sit with your emotions. No judging! Become aware of your feelings and don’t push them aside. Feelings aren’t right or wrong, they’re just yours. If you start thinking your feelings are bad, you are likely to be ashamed which just adds more negativity. Take a few moments to pause and consider what your mind and maybe even your body are trying to tell you. If you can slow this part down, you can learn to let it pass without over-reacting.
Looking in naturally changes how you interact when looking out. That’s a good first step in increasing your EQ and helping to pave your path to success.